A fact that few know about this beautiful substance is that MD actually stands for Mogen David, not Mad Dog.
Not that anybody actually cares what its true alias is; all that really matters is its splendid palette, subtle hints of artificial fruit and 13% alcohol content; a bottle being enough to slay a dragon.
This should most often be read out loud before cracking a bottle of the MD 20/20(copywritten):
20/20, Mogen Dee
I sure could go a bottle.
I think I’ll crack my shoesies on,
And off I’ll go-a-waddle.
Londis, Nisa, Aldi’s too,
I’m sure they all sell Dave.
But can they give me what I want?
It’s strawberreee I crave.
Mogen David’s what I need
But I.D’s what I lack.
If this fine man asks me for I.D
His jaw is sure to get cracked!
‘Uno of your finest strawberreee’
I tell the fine man as he comes.
‘Have you got I.D?’ he asks me,
‘Oh no, it’s for my mum!’
‘The benefit of the doubt I’ll give you, But this be warned I tell.’
‘Bad deeds be done upon this stuff,
You’re bound to go to hell!’
‘But no, dear man I think you’ll find
That I’m the Mogen master.’
‘Now come with me, my dear old boy,
And let us get-a-plastered!’
So off we go to Bothwell Lane,
A nasty night ahead.
We stank the Mogen to the dregs,
And the poor old man drops dead.
Now sure enough I’m damned to hell;
Man slaughter’s the name of the game.
But after cracking that bottle of joy,
I’d sure do it all again!
And bound to hell as I may be,
Hell’s turned out to be terrific.
Dirty women, rock & roll,
And they all think Mogen’s the shiznic!
So crack that lid, breathe that scent,
It’s certainly worth the do.
Mogen David is sure for everyone,
And chaps, this includes all of you.